Black out.

Stupid me! Have been standing on the parade ground for so long and yet I had to fall out cos I felt I was going to faint. Felt that I've let the whole contingent down. I mean if I was one of the girls at least it wasn't that bad. But I'm a contingent commander. Supposed to set a good example for the girls but I didn't.

Well... When the march past was carried on... I felt a sense of coldness on my face. And I didn't feel too good already. And out of sudden, I couldn't see! My world was turning darker and darker every second. Couldn't take it anymore, I squatted down. But I told myself I couldn't fall out at that moment! Cos everything was going to end soon! I stood up again and clench my fist tight. But eventually the world turned darker again. Arghz. Squatted down.. and stood up... squatted down and stood up. N finally I heard the transformation music. I quickly tried to get to my position. But the thing was I couldn't see where I was going!!! I tried to ask my girls for help but the next thing I know was that the medic was there to stretcher me out of the parade ground. I told them 'NO' and I was okie! but.. haiz! I still failed as a contingent commander! Shux. I asked God to help me but still I wasn't strong enough. Sorry Father. Sorry girls. Sorry mdms!

Once..

Upon a time, in the western area of Singapore, there lived a beautiful princess named Jasmine. Mind you, Jasmine may not look pretty in appearance wise, but she does bring out her inner beauty quite well. (uh hem) Back to her story... She has a kind and simple minded mother, a naggy but the greatest father, and a good old brother... Together they live in a 2 level HDB flat. Those were the days that she had a beautiful childhood. Let see, where shall we start about her life as a young kid. Her brother used to follow her anywhere she went, be it in the house or outside the corridor playing. Until one fine sunny day, Jasmine could not take it and told her brother off. However, this did not deter his brother from following her. Not that she does not like her brother but well... Anyway, they did have an enjoyable childhood playing together. Hmmz...

enuff of me crapping. Ha. Time flies n now I am grown up lady. Back to the reality! WAKE UP!

Fate, what a word...
That's used when 2 person are together...
Do I believe in fate?
Yes I do...

Sweet little pumpkin...

My pumpkin is very sweet. He helped me buy something. hahaa.. Thanks dar!

Gu Dan

Alone. Spending quality time with absolutely no one except yourself is very important. At least it's time for you to relfect on your life so far. I haven't been spending time alone ever starting of the year. I'm either busy with studies if not work or friends. Hardly at home.

The only time that I was alone, was last like Friday? Went to Esplanade on my own. Sat there alone with no one else except me and only strangers walking past me. The scent of the sea makes me feel so relieved, of the stress and saddness that was inside me. Hot tears rolled down on my cheeks.

And now, I'm holding back my tears. You can only hear sniffing. Can't help but to feel that way. PMS is haunting me. What to do? Do anyone of you really understand what I am going through? You all don't! Nobody does, I guess.

Just want to hide myself under the blanket after a cup of hot Milo. To make me feel contended.

The office is filled with laughter. I'm sitting here alone feeling tired.

Missing Him...

Missing God.

Haven't been a good child recently. Haven't gone for a church for quite a while. I miss telling Him how much I love Him. I miss singing praise and giving thanks to Him. I miss His confort, His big and warm hands around me. I miss the times that I play guitar for Him. I miss every of my brothers and sisters who I know. I miss Him.

God is good, all the time. And all the time, God is good. The great and almighty God is always so good to me. Thank You Father for not forsaking me. Thank You Lord. Thank You for everything that You have done for me. Sacrificed Jesus, Your only son for us. Thank You for helping me and answering my prayers and needs. Thank You for your unconditional love. Thank You for every small little things.

Claudia McCants

Somtimes life leads you in a new direction.
And even when you don't feel prepared,
or when you don't want to change,
you are forced to start over.
Life is like that... there are no guarantees.
It make you feel scared or anxious or sad.

But after you've shed your last tear~
just when you think everything
is out of your hands~
you take a deep breath
and finally realize that you have complete control.

Survival is about reclaiming your "self".
It is about learning to love who you are.
It is about making wise choices, setting goals,
and finding out what really makes you happy.
It is about rediscovering those things you always wanted to do.

Happiness is something that
has to come from within.
Nobody can provide it for you.

You are beautilful, caring,
wonderful person.
You are worthy of all good things.
I know life is hard right now,
but please know that
I am always here for you.

This is a new beginning!
I can't wait to see what you do!

Jasmine to Sylvester...

Twisted!

Clumsy me.. Twisted my leg last Friday when I was on my way back home. Didn't see the hole in the grass. So I guess you know what happen next... Went to see a sinseh only yesterday... Cos I noe it can be dragged anymore if not won't heal so fast. yup yup...

Now in office... haiz.

Depressed

Depressed is the word that I'm using for myself today. I cried. Morning till noon till evening till night. Does anyone care? No! Cos I deserved it I guess. Good things don't come together... But bad things will. I am going crazy. I feel like escaping. Perhaps a hole in the earth seems quite like a hiding place.

I want to cover myself. With anything. I am tired. I am sad. I am depressed. I am stressed. I am crying again. Shux! I want someone to cuddle up with me and tell me that it is alright at least he/she is still around. I know... God is there. I talked to Him last night. It was quite a nice conversation. Thank you Lord for comforting me.

Alone. I don't wish to be alone. I am scared of being alone. I just need someone to be with me.

I am tired. Tired of breathing, walking, eating, sleeping. Tired of this world. A world that seems dark and cold.

xiang re guo shang de ma yi

hahaha... it's a chinese errrr.. idiom isit? Dunch noe... hahaha.. anyway it's describing the busy-ness that a ant will be when it's on the hot plate. hahaha... Yup! Busy yesterday and today! alrite... not say very busy but... it was quite time consuming! haha...

Yesterday was my first day at Alsco... A company that deals with washroom hygiene service, dustmats, workwear and linen... It was fun working with my sec sch friend too! hahaha... none other than Claudia~ cool... :)